How do you keep things exciting?

“How do you keep things exciting? was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

My sub and I have a “regular” relationship in addition to a D/s dynamic. That means we live together, take care of a child, celebrate parties together, eat together – in short, we go through all the daily routines together, just like anyone else. On top of that, we both work as freelancers. You could say we’re busy. Sometimes even very busy. And during those very busy moments, BDSM is still a thing. Because if there’s one thing that doesn’t lend itself to a “quickie,” it’s BDSM.

Daily Routine

Of course, D/s is woven into our daily routine. For example, when I call him over to chat, I prefer to do so while he’s kneeling on the floor in front of me, and when he wakes up in the morning, the first thing he has to do is kiss my feet. He sometimes forgets, but he usually remembers. There are a few other daily D/s moments like that, but you can imagine that I don’t hoist him upside down in the ropes every day, flog him on my St. Andrew’s Cross, or make him crawl around the house like a pig. The latter is a bit tricky anyway with a toddler running around the house. Not to mention the fact that I wouldn’t have the time or energy for that on a daily basis.

So how do you keep things exciting? How do you make sure you keep seeing each other within the BDSM context? I think it’s important because it creates a good focus or even makes for a sweeter partner. Because for me, the more sadistic I can be, the sweeter I become. And for him, the more pain he’s endured, the more he can love me. To the average “vanilla person,” this probably sounds like something for a psychiatrist.

The Pointed Hat

I recently came up with a solution for this. The pointed hat! The pointed hat will help keep BDSM flowing in our lives. I can see you thinking… so I’ll explain. I’ve put little notes in that pointed hat with all kinds of acts I enjoy. Such as, for example: CBT, humbler, bondage, nipple torture, single tail, electro, sounding, needleplay, strap-on, and so on. So it’s a full pointed hat. Why a pointed hat? Well, it just happened to be within reach when I came up with the idea.

Every day when my sub comes home from work, he gets to pull one out. And that very same evening, we get to work on it. Or… if it really doesn’t work out, the note stays there until the next day and gets added to that day’s activities. So it can really pile up if you don’t get to work on them regularly…

Fun!

Intense? Yeah, he thinks so too. And what do I think? I just love it!! Especially because it keeps me on my toes. Normally, I tend to reach for the most common torture devices, but now it’s a surprise for me every single day! And that makes me happy. My sub doesn’t entirely agree, but luckily we have a D/s relationship, so my will is ultimately just law. Nothing can stand in the way of that.

More information

Read more personal notes by Mrs Moriah

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Text & image: Mistress Moriah