Aren't you allowed to earn money from your passion?

"Aren't you allowed to earn money from your passion?" was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

There are certain remarks that I unfortunately hear far too often and that - even though I am above them - still always gnaw at me a little. Not because they are justified, but because they are so bitter in their lack of understanding. By the way, I am not writing this blog out of anger. Quite the opposite. I am writing this out of love for my work, my passion and for the people who run into the same lack of understanding. And perhaps also a little for myself.

The quiet poison: giving away for free out of passion

Every day I open up my words to the world. I write blogs, share insights, record podcasts, inspire, inform and guide. Not behind a paywall, not packaged in subscriptions and certainly not as a slick marketing machine. Simply. Openly. Freely accessible. Because I believe that knowledge about BDSM should be shared, because I feel that real information can change lives and because I know that the right guidance can prevent unsafe situations. I do this openly through all my posts, but often also behind the scenes in the many messages I receive every day.

And all of that - I give away. For free. With love, with time, with effort and with my whole soul. This is not about a measly few minutes; it is about several hours every single day. And that is fine, because it is my quest (for more recognition and understanding of the loving side of BDSM) and therefore my choice.

And yet... am I not allowed to ask for money?

Yet it happens - almost daily. That reproach about asking money for my BDSM workshops, my training courses, my coaching/Live dates and my BDSM experiences. That remark that begins with: "But... if it's your passion, why do you charge money for it?" As if passion and professionalism may not exist together, as if devotion means you have to efface yourself and as if you are only genuine if you stay broke.

Everyone is allowed to earn money. For advice, for knowledge, for craftsmanship. A lawyer, a baker, a carpenter, a hairdresser, an artist. But when you work from passion, and on top of that in a world that many people find exciting, you are suddenly made to look suspicious. Then the passion you feel becomes a reason to undermine your efforts. Then giving becomes taken for granted and asking is condemned.

Passion is not an obligation to be poor

Let me put this clearly: My passion is my driving force. Not my chain or my rope.

I work with heart and soul, I guide people into the depths, I carry responsibility and I offer safety, knowledge, experience, insight. That is not a hobby, that is craftsmanship. Passion does not make me less professional, it makes me better.
Because I feel what I do, because I live what I share and because I do not push people through a revolving door, but truly go along on the journey. A journey of descent into themselves, in search of their wholeness, their homecoming into their ultimate being.

And yes, that may cost something. Because passion does not fill a fridge. Passion does not pay for website hosting, it does not cover insurance, nor my mortgage, and it does not buy materials either. Passion drives me, but true dedication also requires a practical foundation.

What happens behind the scenes

For every BDSM workshop I give:

• there is preparation,

• there is coordination,

• there are materials,

• there are costs,

• there are investments in knowledge,

• there is energy that has to be moved.

With every experience I guide:

• I read e-mails,

• I tune in to people,

• I prepare the space,

• I take care of aftercare,

• I have gathered a great deal of knowledge and gained experience,

• I am available - far, far beyond the session itself.

For every training course I offer:

• I create my own course material,

• I immerse myself in the subject,

• I prepare thoroughly,

• I arrange a location,

• I maintain network contacts,

• I update my knowledge of safety, anatomy, first aid and psychology.

That is work, that is a profession and that means responsibility. And that deserves to be rewarded. With love and with money. And no, money is not a dirty word.

Passion as a breeding ground, not as a sacrifice

My passion is not a sacrifice. It is a breeding ground. A source I draw from in order to give. But if you only ever give,
without ever being allowed to receive, passion slowly turns into exhaustion.

I actually want my passion to grow. I want my work to continue to exist. I want to be able to develop new workshops. I want to inspire even more people, guide them, let them safely taste a world that is so often misunderstood. And for that, reciprocity is needed. Not just applause, not just likes or kind words, but also appreciation that is real. So also in plain, hard cash.

Dare to acknowledge value

We live in a culture in which convenience has become the norm. Free information, free knowledge and free entertainment. But real value - that asks for more. It asks for recognition, investment, respect for the path someone has walked in order to deliver that work. When someone with knowledge, skill, experience and passion builds something beautiful,
an exchange of energy belongs with it. And money is not a sign of corruption in that. It is a form of recognition.
Of respect.

For the road that has been travelled, for the knowledge that has been gathered and for the space that is created to let others grow. That applies not only to me, but to everyone who stands in life in that way.

Finally – love and value are allowed to exist together

My passion is sincere. My love for BDSM is real. And my wish to inspire, guide and open up others
is greater than I could ever put into words. But that does not mean I have to live on air, or that I have to efface myself. And it also does not mean that my work is worth less because I love it.

Precisely because I love it, precisely because I feel how valuable this path can be, I ask what it is worth. Because passion deserves respect. And passion should be allowed to flourish in appreciation, not in exhaustion.

Mistress Moriah

Source

Text & photo: Mistress Moriah