BDSM and your GP. Tell them? Or not?

“BDSM and your GP. Tell them? Or not?“ was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

You are a sub (m/f) and you love being whipped hard. After a session like that, your body is beautifully marked with blue and red patches. You wear your marks with pride. To you, they are the beautiful proof of an intense time together, something you can savour for days. But what do you do if you unexpectedly have to see your GP or go to A&E? Are you open about your BDSM practices then? In this blog I'm going to explain why that could be a sensible thing to do. Although of course it is always your own choice.

Your GP as a person you can trust

Your GP, the person who knows not only your aches and ailments, but perhaps also your preference for restraints and whips. Do you find that a difficult idea? Your GP is someone you can confide in. They are there to support you in every aspect of your health, including your sexual wellbeing. By being open about your BDSM activities, you give your doctor the full context to offer you the best care. Moreover, talking about your sexual preferences can contribute to a better understanding and more trust between you and your doctor. But there may be more reasons why being honest with your GP can be important.

Medical benefits of being open

Let's be honest: BDSM can sometimes lead to physical souvenirs, from bruises to more serious injuries. If your GP knows about your kinky adventures, they can better judge whether that mysterious bruise is the result of an enthusiastic evening or something that needs further investigation.

On top of that, BDSM is not without risk. No matter how much experience you have, something can always go wrong. In a study called 'The Kink Health Project', 44% of participants said they had sought medical help after a BDSM session. The most common complaints were bruising and open wounds from activities such as hitting with whips, fisting and the use of needles or sex toys. There were also concerns about exposure to sexually transmitted infections, in particular HIV and hepatitis B and C. Getting tested regularly for these infections, especially if you often play with others, can be important.

Breaking the stigma

We live in a world where 'Fifty Shades' has sparked both curiosity and prejudice. Sadly, there is still a stigma around BDSM, which can lead to misunderstandings, even within the medical community. By being open with your GP, you help normalise diverse sexual preferences and you help reduce the stigma. This can not only improve your own care, but also pave the way for others to be honest about their sexual preferences without fear of judgement.

But it also prevents wrong conclusions. If you aren't open about how those bruises came about, your GP may become suspicious of possible domestic violence. Or draw other wrong conclusions. By being open, you give your GP more insight to make a better diagnosis.

Practical tips for the conversation

Now I can hear you thinking: "That's all well and good, but how do I start such a conversation?" Here are a few tips to break the ice:

Choose the right moment
If you like, book an appointment specifically to discuss your sexual health, so there is enough time and you don't feel rushed. But if it feels better to mention it in passing during another appointment, that's perfectly fine too.

Be direct but discreet
You don't need to go into detail about your last session, but give a general picture of your activities and any concerns you have.

Use supporting material
If you like, bring articles or information that can help your doctor understand what BDSM involves.

Ask about experience
Ask whether your doctor has had patients with similar preferences before and how they handled it.

When caution is called for

Although honesty is often the best policy, there are situations in which you may want to think before you put your entire BDSM life on the table. If you get the feeling that your doctor isn't open to this kind of conversation, or if you have had negative experiences before, it can be wise to first gauge how your doctor feels about sexuality in general. In some cases it may be advisable to look for a 'kink-aware' professional who is familiar with and open to diverse sexual preferences.

Mistress Moriah

Source

Text: Mistress Moriah
Photography: 123rf.com