What exactly is a switch?

“What exactly is a switch?” was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

In addition to the specific roles in BDSM such as dominant and submissive, there is also the role of the switch (also known as a switcher). And no, this has nothing to do with Nintendo’s game console. A switch is someone who alternates between dominant and submissive within BDSM. This dual role can be played during a single session or spread across multiple occasions with different partners. In a relationship with someone who shares the same preference (for example, dominant), a switch can “switch” roles so that both partners have the opportunity to play their favorite role.

Some people aren’t specifically drawn to just one side of the BDSM spectrum, but actually enjoy experiencing both sides. This can be done with a single partner, but usually these experiences are shared with multiple (play) partners.

In their own way

Not all switches are the same; everyone experiences it in their own way, and that’s perfectly fine, of course. One person might enjoy switching very occasionally, while another might do it sporadically or very often. Some BDSM practitioners find this concept difficult to grasp. They don’t believe that such a thing as a switch can exist. For them, you’re either dominant or sub. Nonsense, of course. Why couldn’t you be both? It might simply have to do with the interaction between you and what the other person brings out in you. Not everyone has the same energy; it just depends on what resonates with you. And that doesn’t apply to everyone either. Some people, on the other hand, are completely convinced of “their role.” And that’s fine, too. Everyone experiences it differently, and let’s not attach any judgment to the word “different.” “Different” isn’t better or worse. “Different” is just “different.”

A true switch is rare; it’s possible, but it’s uncommon for someone to truly embody both sides. Usually, these people are still searching and discovering. And that’s perfectly fine too!

Advantages

There are also advantages to switching. Once you have experience with both roles, you can empathize better with the other person. After all, you share that experience.

True to yourself

The most important thing is that you stay true to yourself. Be honest with yourself and with the other person. If you don’t feel comfortable with just one side of the BDSM coin, talk about it. Share your questions and desires. Honesty is the foundation of the intensity and trust between you. It’s really not unusual for feelings to change over time; after all, you grow through all your experiences. And at different stages of life, different roles might be a better fit. And no, that doesn’t apply to everyone. We’re all unique, so no one can decide this for someone else.

More information

BDSM – Theme page
Relationships & Roles – Theme Page

Source

Text: Mistress Moriah
Photography: 123rf.com