What is primal play?

“What is primal play” was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

I’m curious – not so much that I secretly open my sweetheart’s mail or scroll through his phone (though I certainly do that sometimes as part of TPE, but then it’s about control and not curiosity) – but I am always genuinely interested in forms of play I don’t yet know. So when I recently looked at my regular sub’s Fetlife page and saw that he was into “primal play,” my curiosity was piqued. Because I knew (from experience) that he wasn’t really into puppy play, and when I heard the term “primal play,” I couldn’t think of much beyond “animal play” – but if primal play is the same as animal play, why use a different term?

So I set out to satisfy my curiosity and dove into the information about primal play. Of course, I’m happy to share the results of my search with you! Because, ultimately, primal play has very little to do with animal play.

What are the basic instincts?

First, a quick note about how our brains work. The primitive part of our brain is responsible for survival. This means that our basic instincts – such as finding food, self-protection, and reproduction – are located here. Primitive humans simply enjoy sex without any inhibitions, as part of our survival instinct.

What is primal play?

And primal play is based on this primary part of our brain. If you dive deeper into the layers of primal play, only a hint of animal play remains. It has nothing to do with wagging your tail like a puppy or being locked up in a crate. It’s all about animal instincts. Actually, the best way to translate this term is “primal play” – returning to your instincts and surrendering to your primal urges. This can take the form of biting, scratching, hitting, growling, but also, for example, raw or rough sex, where you momentarily quiet your mind (and switch off your rationality).

In primal play, you don’t agree on roles beforehand; instead, you let it unfold naturally. That means the prey can take turns being the hunter, and vice versa. It’s a raw game and it’s purely about following your instincts. Perfect for those who are often lost in their own thoughts. You don’t let your brain or “what’s supposed to be normal” hold you back, but instead surrender to the animalistic layers of your brain. Sex without inhibitions.

Can there still be a question of consent?

That’s a good question, of course. Is there, for example, still room for empathy when you surrender to animal instincts? One doesn’t necessarily have to rule out the other. Even many animals feel a kind of empathy – mammals, even fish. That means there will always be some sense of empathy present, allowing you to continue respecting the other person’s boundaries.

At least, that is the intention, of course. Consensus is an important prerequisite within BDSM. Without consensus, your actions could easily be viewed as criminal offenses.

So even in primal play, it’s important to make agreements with each other beforehand. Perhaps not about the division of roles—that can develop naturally during the play – but certainly about certain intensities. Think, for example, of biting or scratching. Is that desired? To a certain extent? Or an absolute no-go? It’s helpful to know this about each other before you get started. And so, for this form of play as well, agree on a safe word or a signal.

Is it still “real” then?

If you have to take these restrictions into account, can it still be considered a “primal play”? This question falls into the same category as the question: “If the dominant has to take the sub’s boundaries into account, are they still the determining factor?” And it is precisely these kinds of contradictions that make BDSM so beautiful and intense!

So, primal play is about not overthinking (or talking yourself out of it) but just doing it! And if you agree on the truly hard limits and a good safe word beforehand, you can then descend into your primal instincts and enjoy this rough sex!

More information

Relationships & Roles – Theme page
Animal Play & Pet Play – Theme Page

Source

Text: Mistress Moriah
Photography: 123rf.com