Playing with orgasm
“Playing with the orgasm” was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.
Another word for orgasm is climax. You experience an orgasm as a result of arousal caused by sexual stimuli, whether self-induced or by others. During climax, the pelvic floor muscles contract several times in combination with a pleasurable sensation in the genitals. When you train these muscles, you can make this moment even more intense. Men usually climax a bit faster than women, but women, on the other hand, get aroused a bit faster. So it’s pretty evenly balanced.
Playing with orgasm
Within BDSM, there’s plenty of play involving orgasm. For example, through:
- Delaying or denying climax
- Ruined orgasm
- Multiple (forced) climaxes
- Milking
- Chastity belt
- Reward
Delaying or denying climax
You can use arousal perfectly to explore and push boundaries further. Arousal (or rather, all the hormones responsible for this feeling) is a good motivator. Be a bit careful with this, though, because while it’s fine to explore boundaries, do so with caution. Arousal can also lead to overconfidence, which can ultimately result in someone being mentally or physically (unintentionally) harmed.
What is a ruined orgasm?
It’s an English term for which there isn’t really a good Dutch equivalent yet. It literally means a ruined orgasm, also described as a “blanks.” Ejaculation does occur, but without the intense pleasure. The play builds up to a peak but without a real climax. This can be achieved by stimulating until the point where an orgasm is inevitable, and stopping right at that moment. The body has already initiated ejaculation, but the pleasurable sensation is absent because the stimulation has stopped. However, the arousal has also vanished and has often given way to frustration. A proper mindfuck, then, which you as a dominant can take advantage of.
Multiple (forced) climaxes
For a female sub, there are wonderful harnesses into which a magic wand can be inserted to force an orgasm. That first time is wonderful, but if you don’t remove the magic wand after the climax, the aftermath becomes a lot less fun.
Of course, you can also force multiple orgasms in men, and while that might sound fantastic, it really isn’t funny. You can use a milking machine for this, but also a masturbator (or just your hands).
Milking
To milk the prostate, you need to massage the prostate gland. This gland is also known as the male G-spot. By stimulating this spot, the sub can reach ejaculation. You can use your finger for this (preferably with short nails to avoid damaging the tissue), but there are also special stimulators available for purchase.
The prostate contains various nerves and is therefore very sensitive. It is about the size of a walnut or chestnut and is located below the bladder, just in front of the rectum (the final section before the colon). This is about 5 cm deep inside the anus. When you insert a finger into the anus, you will feel a raised area of at least 2.5 cm. Some men are able to reach orgasm by stimulating this spot.
Chastity belt
Wearing a chastity belt not only prevents the possibility of an orgasm; if it works properly, it also prevents getting an erection. Or at least, the erection suddenly becomes a lot more painful. Still, an orgasm while wearing a chastity belt is not entirely impossible. For example, with metal cages, it is possible to “rattle” a bit between the bars, which (with the right arousal) makes it possible to reach an orgasm while still wearing the chastity belt.
The reward
Holding out the prospect of an orgasm as a reward can, of course, be a wonderful motivator to take that extra small step toward intensifying the experience. A great tool for the dominant.
The intensity after an orgasm
The orgasm – or rather, the arousal – can play an important role during a BDSM experience. This is largely due to the effects of certain hormones. These hormones form the basis for the ability to endure pain stimuli. Once an orgasm has occurred, pain simply feels like pain again. Arousal must first build up again before pain stimuli can be tolerated. This is therefore an important factor for the dominant to keep in mind. Even the gentlest touch feels more intense after an orgasm. Let alone a lash of the whip…
More information
Source
Text: Mistress Moriah
Image: 123rf.com
