This is my BDSM experience (or Femdom specifically)

“This is my BDSM experience (or Femdom specifically)“ was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

This page contains adult educational information about BDSM and is intended exclusively for readers aged 18 and over.

In this blog I would like to tell you what my BDSM experience is, but before I do that I want to start by dispelling an idea that some people have: I am not a man-hater. Quite the opposite. I love men, and always have. And apart from the fact that every house has its own cross to bear (mine included), I don't have a traumatic past, as is sometimes assumed. Of course I have faced my share of challenges in life, just like anyone else. I lost my first son, I have looked death in the eye several times, and I have been abused and raped.

An honest, natural Femdom relationship

But I have been able to give all of it a place, as far as possible. And not one of these things has anything to do with my preference for BDSM, and Femdom in particular. Purely because at a young age (so well before all of these events) I already had my first natural Femdom relationship. Not based on other people's experiences (the internet didn't exist yet and my parents had a vanilla relationship), but out of a kind of primal feeling, an inner knowing. I didn't know any better, I simply did what felt right to me.

I was born dominant, there is little I can do about that (and so not much I can change about it either), and over the years I have lovingly learned to embrace my sadism, because I have learned that it is precisely my sadism that can give people the most beautiful things. One of the wonderful apparent contradictions within BDSM.

The law of balance

Anyone who has been following and reading me for a while knows that I believe in the law of balance. Everything strives for balance, all of nature, and so humans too. I have already written several blogs about what imbalance or pleasing does to you. BDSM gives people powerful tools to come fully back into balance, and in a short time at that. So not with months of therapy, but with an intense BDSM experience of a few hours. My first collection of poems, from about 12 years ago, was not called "The superlative of love is BDSM" for nothing. Because that is what it is for me. For me, BDSM is the ultimate form of universal love.

Sadistic and hard

If you were to look at me from a distance, unknowing, while I am busy with a sub, you might get the image of a selfish, hard and sadistic person. Someone who enjoys another person's pain. You are partly right about that, especially about the enjoying, but I am not hard or selfish. Quite the opposite. I am fully in balance with my empathetic, warm and loving side. I don't hit for the sake of hitting. I don't torment the other person for the sake of the pain. I do it because I know what it is going to bring them. I know that pain stimuli can take the receiver out of their head, which creates space for mental healing. Bringing them back to that much-needed balance. If that onlooker were to look into the receiver's eyes afterwards, he would see how happy they are, and how grateful too.

And the road to a quiet mind is different for everyone. For one person it is through physical pain, for another through mental pain, financial pain or a role play. The way there is different for everyone. That is exactly what makes every blueprint of "together" so unique. That is why BDSM is not a "one fits all game" and is so much more than waving a little whip around or calling everyone a "Loser" and sending a payment request.

Loving and with passion

And that is how I experience BDSM. Loving, passionate and positive. Giving the other person a valuable gift that no price tag can be hung on, because it is far too special for that. I am a giver and yes, I enjoy what I do. Precisely because I love people, and men in particular. I sense where they (incidentally, that goes for men and women alike) want to go, consciously or unconsciously, and I take them by the hand. I abduct them to places they would never have gone (dared or been able to go) alone. I put them in touch with every side of themselves, so that they are able to accept themselves as a whole. I see them in their complete nakedness. Not only physically, but above all mentally. Because with me they are allowed and able to be themselves safely.

And that makes BDSM, for me, a beautiful, positive, loving experience, in which everything revolves around balance and ultimately nothing is what it seems...

Mistress Moriah

Source

Text: Mistress Moriah
Image: Art of Pictures