What is vanilla or vanilla sex?
“What is vanilla or vanilla sex?” was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.
You may have come across the term “vanilla” before. Vanilla or vanilla sex simply means conventional sex. In other words, the opposite of kinky, BDSM, or experimental sex. It’s a term that has been circulating within the BDSM scene since the 1970s. It refers to the way most people experience sex – whether or not with a kinky touch. Vanilla sex mainly involves a lot of cuddling, kissing, and caressing. In this style of lovemaking, you’ll often encounter the missionary position.
What is the name “vanilla” based on?
Chances are it refers to the vanilla flavor. A standard – perhaps even slightly boring – flavor, without too many frills. “Doesn’t that mean there’s no passion involved?” you might wonder. Of course there is. You can also experience vanilla sex in a passionate way, but without the stimulation of toys or other complicated factors.
With vanilla sex, you have enough in each other, without extra stimulation. Caressing, kissing, touching, foreplay, sexual acts, or even watching a porn movie together—it all falls under the umbrella of “vanilla sex.”
What is “bambi sex”?
Some people sometimes refer to vanilla sex as “bambi sex.” Others make a distinction, defining “bambi sex” as involving no sexual acts, only cuddling, kissing, and caressing – possibly with clothes on – or they don’t take a stance on the matter.
Is vanilla sex boring?
Nonsense. You can make it as fun and exciting as you want. It’s just a different taste, and that’s perfectly fine. We don’t all have to like pistachio or hazelnut. Different isn’t better or worse; different is just different. So vanilla is just as cool as BDSM. It’s just different. Maybe a bit tamer.
But never doubt your preference. Whether it’s kinky, BDSM, or vanilla, you’re perfectly fine just the way you are. The most important thing is that you find a partner who fits with that. And if they’re into vanilla too? Then you can fully enjoy each other and all that caressing, kissing, licking, and cuddling. Full of sweet words, romance, and tenderness.
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Text: Mistress Moriah
Image: 123rf.com
