What's gone stays gone

"What's gone stays gone" was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Dewesop.

Sometimes you get talking to someone on Fetlife and read a few of their writings. Then suddenly you come across a writing about the disappearance of so many SM studios. Something no even slightly observant BDSMer can ignore. In recent years more and more studios have closed their doors, and nothing has come back in their place. It is also getting harder (in some municipalities even impossible) to get a 'sex licence', so I fear it will only decline further. Sadly. That is why I would like to share with you Dewesop's writing titled "What's gone stays gone". Posted, of course, with his permission.

What's gone stays gone

Where are those good old days? Not that everything was better back then. No, certainly not. I once came home and found it terribly stuffy. The house turned out to be full of carbon monoxide. According to my parents there was nothing wrong... well, there really was. These days it's a bit better now that there is no gas heater in the living room any more, but we much more often have central heating or a hot water boiler.

In old Rotterdam

But the good old days, when as a person you could still simply go your own way. How many SM studios are there in Rotterdam now? Mind you, I haven't been inside all of them. But what I still remember from the late 80s: Mistress Catja, if I remember correctly, was close to the Kleinpolderplein. Then there was Mistress Yvonne. She had a studio on the Marconistraat and later on the Berkelselaan. On the Harddraverstraat, close to Central Station, there was also a well-equipped studio run by Mrs Saskia. Studio Mariska. Debby was on the Heemraadsingel, Maria on the Beukelsedijk.

In Rotterdam South you also had three or four addresses. Including someone who had a bed of nails. Then there was Mistress José, address unknown, studio Noir on the Schavendijkwal, and you could also go to the Rochussenstraat.

In the other big cities

In The Hague, Leiden, Amsterdam, Deventer, Apeldoorn, Zwolle and Utrecht it was really no different. Famous, of course, were the Grensstraat in Amsterdam and the Hubert van de Pootstraat in Utrecht, where the very plump Mistress Corrie ruled the roost. I also still remember a few window Mistresses in the red light district. (Back then the red light district was still truly red because of the many Dutch ladies. Now it is a bit more international and therefore a bit more colourful.)

Where has it all gone?

Where has the whole scene gone? What has made it almost all disappear?
First of all, laws and regulations. Do you have an establishment licence? Is it even allowed in that neighbourhood? What does the zoning plan say?
Digitalisation: both client and provider are much easier to track. Geographically, financially, Chamber of Commerce registrations and so on.
The rise of the internet. If it's only for the arousal, perhaps a little screen with some sound is enough.

Perhaps it is also no longer as frank and free. Nowadays people much more quickly come with photos from the internet: do you know that over there it is upholstered in black leather? At your place it's just bare wood. Perhaps you are also judged more on appearance now. Not that ideal picture? Move along!

Off to Hungary!

But the prudishness and the regulations have made the Netherlands far more prudish when it comes to BDSM.
I no longer go to Poland, Turkey or Romania just for my teeth, a facelift or laser eye surgery. No, soon we slaves will go to Hungary for our teeth and straight away pay a visit to the studio there. It will be a lovely holiday. Outer and inner care: for the teeth, the eyes and our masochistic leanings.

Perhaps the strict Mistress will tell the dentist that no anaesthetic is needed. And it will be hard to sit on those red buttocks on the plane back to the Netherlands. Because you really should have learnt the word mercy properly in Polish or Romanian.

But seriously, I think it's a shame. Something cultural and social is being badly broken in the Netherlands.

Mistress Moriah

Source

Text: Dewesop
Image: 123rf.com