The sense of security at Ageplay

“The Sense of Safety in Ageplay” was written for BDSMforyou.nl by Mistress Moriah.

Ageplay is also a sensitive topic within the BDSM scene (completely unjustifiably). For some, it rubs too closely against pedophilic feelings. Yet the two have absolutely nothing to do with each other. After all, the play is exclusively between adults, and the focus is on safety and security, not primarily on sexuality. Personally, I find Ageplay a beautiful, pure experience because it touches a nurturing, empathetic, and loving side of me, which is just as valid as my sadistic and dominant side. I am not just one side; my entire being is the sum of both. This is how I am (and remain) well-balanced.

Ageplay: Going Back in Time

In ageplay, you “go back in time.” This can mean going back to infancy, but it’s not always necessary to go that far back. For example, you can also go back to childhood or even adolescence. Babyplay naturally involves a mother or father, since a baby can’t take care of itself. With little boys & little girls, that isn’t necessarily required. They can also arrange playdates with each other. In ageplay, at least one of the two players always goes back to childhood or infancy. But it’s also possible for both of you to go back.

Mommydom

In Mommydom, there is often babyplay where “Mommy” takes on the caregiving role. This can be accompanied by a diaper fetish, but that certainly doesn’t always have to be the case. The reverse is also true: someone with a diaper fetish doesn’t always have an interest in ageplay. These can be two completely different experiences. They can go together, but they certainly don’t have to.

Mommydom is primarily about the feeling of safety and security. A moment of being, without responsibilities, because you can trust that there is someone watching over you. This brings ultimate peace of mind; you can’t do anything (because you’re a baby), so you don’t have to do anything either. After all, Mommy takes care of you. Maybe you enjoy being fed a bottle, being physically cared for, or perhaps you love lying on her lap and listening to a story she reads to you. How beautiful and intense that can be. Maybe she tells you lovely fairy tales while you suck on a pacifier and she gently strokes your back.

Daddydom

Daddydom usually involves a Little girl (or boy), and often this little girl is quite a bit mischievous. Yet she enjoys the protective role her Daddy plays. She can be mischievous because Daddy watches over her. He takes care of her so she can be completely herself. Unlike Mommydom, Daddydom can involve sexuality. Of course, this roleplay also revolves around two adults, one of whom is revisiting the experience of being a young girl.

The experience

For adults, this can be a way to make up for what was never there before. You might therefore wonder whether this still falls under BDSM or if it’s more of a form of therapy. But perhaps this applies to more experiences as well. Ultimately, (almost) all forms of play share the same goal: peace of mind. One person might achieve this through bondage, another through pain, and it can also be achieved through ageplay. And there is absolutely nothing – and I mean absolutely nothing- wrong with that.

Ageplay and Prejudice

Unfortunately, however, ageplayers often face a great deal of prejudice – even from within the BDSM community. It’s a shame, because whether or not you’re into it, ageplay is also about trust and the silence of nothingness. “The child” places their complete trust in the “caregiver.”

In this experience, punishment may also occur, potentially involving pain stimuli, and so here too you see an overlap in the experience. There are actually no hard and fast boundaries or lines; sometimes things simply blend into one another. That’s what makes BDSM a custom experience, and so there is no “one size fits all” scenario.

Ageplay, live and let live

People who engage in ageplay aren’t hurting anyone. Their experience may be different from yours, but different doesn’t mean it’s worse or better. You don’t have to be into it – they probably view your experience the same way – but above all, refrain from making value judgments. It’s simply “different,” and “different” carries no value judgment. Ultimately, we’re all striving for the same thing: “To be seen as a whole, to be allowed to be who we are, and to find peace of mind.” And there’s nothing wrong with that!

More information

Mommydom ageplay – A first experience as Mommy
What is infantilism, and is it related to pedophilia?
Ageplay – theme page

Source

Text & image: Mistress Moriah